BHB 84

“… Let go.” Yeowon responded coldly. At this moment, he wouldn’t react well to anyone who tried to stop him.

“What are you doing on the street right now?”

This was the first time he’d seen this side of him since meeting again. Like an exemplary senior trying to correct a junior’s wrong behavior. Such moments required a certain level of authority and strength to restrain someone. Baek Seungha had been exactly that kind of senior during their school days. A senior who scolded juniors appropriately and clearly taught right from wrong. Though they were all troublemakers of the same sort, Yeowon had found that maturity quite admirable back then.

“… Whatever I do on the street… is my business.”

Being deliberately contrary, Yeowon sneered and slowly got up. Then he forcefully shook off Seungha’s controlling hand from his wrist.

“Mind your own business and go.” Yeowon spoke dryly while dusting off the remnants of violence from his pants. 

Meanwhile, the victim seemed to have regained consciousness slightly, holding his swollen face while rolling his trembling eyes around, looking for a way to escape. Yeowon, with no intention of letting him go, firmly stepped on his squirming leg.

“Kugh!”

Applying enough pressure to potentially break his leg, Yeowon addressed Baek Seungha, who was standing silently.

“This bastard was the one who started it.”

Yeowon let out a deflated laugh with his alcohol-slowed speech. Baek Seungha was looking down at him with slightly narrowed eyes. His gaze was cold, as if whatever the other person had done, he was in the wrong. His already foul mood was darkening.

“I’m telling you, he started it.”

“… So, feeling better now?”

“No. Not even close.”

“It’s been a while since I’ve seen this.”

Yeowon frowned deeply at the unexpected comment.

“You’re causing trouble like this.”

“… This fucking asshole started it, I told you.”

“Sure. Want me to take care of him for you?”

“…”

“I’ve been annoyed that I couldn’t deal with that knife-wielding guy last time.”

Baek Seungha took off his loose shirt and moved actively as if ready to step in. As soon as he removed it, the tattoo on the back of his thin sleeveless undershirt was clearly visible. The guy who had been trembling on the verge of passing out again took a deep breath the moment he saw Seungha’s tattoo.

At this unexpected behavior, Yeowon’s aggressively distorted face gradually relaxed. “… It’s fine. I can handle it myself.”

“Handle it? All you’ve done is mess up his face.”

“I said I can handle it.”

“What did this bastard do to make our junior so pissed off?”

“… I told you to mind your business and go.”

“I don’t want to.”

“…”

“I don’t want to leave you like this.”

Noticing his now-worried gaze, Yeowon instinctively turned his head away to avoid eye contact.

“What should I do?”

“…”

“Wrist or ankle—which do you prefer?”

“… Come on.”

“I’ll break one of them for you.”

“Stop being childish.”

Annoyed by his persistent offers of revenge, Yeowon lifted his foot from where he had been stepping on the guy. Then he gave a light kick to the abdomen of the person still crawling on the ground and commanded in a low voice.

“Hey, get lost.”

The arrival of this interference had made him lose interest. Yeowon issued the order to leave while threatening him.

“Wait. Where do you think you’re going?”

As the guy immediately tried to escape, Baek Seungha attempted to grab him as he was backing away on his buttocks without even standing up. But this time, Yeowon grabbed Seungha’s arm. His firm wrist filled his hand.

“I said stop it.”

“But you said he wronged you.”

“That doesn’t mean you need to get involved.”

“Why not? Can’t I do even this much for you anymore?”

“… I didn’t want to say this.”

“…”

“… Now you care? At this point?”

Yeowon laughed hollowly at his serious question. Standing with his hand on his hip as if dumbfounded, he roughly pushed back his disheveled hair.

It was Seungha who had disappeared without a word, and for a year, Yeowon had searched for him. He visited all his former workplaces and even asked neighbors near his home about his whereabouts. Whenever an unknown number called, he would hurriedly answer with hope. He had sent countless messages and calls to him with no response.

But it was Baek Seungha who had cut ties with him. Though he was glad to see him again, he hadn’t forgotten what happened. He couldn’t understand how he could blame him when he was the one who distanced himself first.

Seungha fell silent at his sharp words. Seeing him hesitate, Yeowon sighed deeply and tried to control his emotions.

“… I’m glad to see you again, but it’s not like before.”

“…”

“I’m not that junior who would die for you anymore.”

“…”

“So stop interfering in my business.” Yeowon coldly ended the conversation and returned to his seat at the convenience store where he’d been drinking. 

It was truly an irritating day in many ways. Even the bruises forming on his knuckles from those few punches annoyed him. Taking a swig directly from the soju bottle, he silently clicked his tongue as he noticed a shadow falling across the table.

The person he thought would leave had followed him. 

Baek Seungha approached the table, sat across from him, and spoke with concern, “Drink slowly.”

He had expected him to be angry or unpleasant. After all, he had responded rudely to his good intentions. He had been disrespectful to a senior from school. But far from angry, he remained calm.

“Why aren’t you angry?”

“About what?”

“I was being a complete ass to you.”

“Well, you weren’t wrong.”

“… Can’t you just leave?”

“Why?”

“Because I’m embarrassed to face you.”

It was annoying and embarrassing that he had witnessed his disgraceful behavior. Sometimes he acted on his emotions. Of course, that was when he was younger, and he hadn’t done anything like this recently. Though he had helped people in trouble, it had been a long time since he’d resorted to violence out of his own frustration.

“…Han Yeowon.”

“… What?” At his quiet call, Yeowon answered without looking up, chewing on beef jerky.

“Were you very hurt by me?”

At this unexpected question, Yeowon finally looked at Seungha. His expression was unreadable—seeming troubled, bitter, not easily gauged.

“… At first I was worried, then I was angry.”

“…”

“In the end, I tried to understand. Thinking you must have had your reasons.”

After trying to think that way, he had forgotten about Baek Seungha. Though he occasionally crossed his mind, he simply figured he was tough and doing well enough.

“I did… have reasons.”

“Was it your parents passing away?”

“That too, but…” Seungha paused and gazed at him intently. “If I tell you those reasons—”

“…”

“Would you go back to how you were with me before?”

“… What do you mean, ‘how I was’? Like a puppy following you around?”

“Just. Would you like me again, like before?”

Unlike his flippant tone, Seungha seemed deeply serious. Faced with his seemingly tense gaze, Yeowon started to respond jokingly but found himself seriously considering it. Even if he heard his reasons, could he care for and follow this senior as before? Now he felt nothing when facing him, completely numb. Could emotions be easily controlled just by deciding to like someone? No matter how much he thought about it, Yeowon couldn’t find an answer.

“I’m not sure.”

At his vague response, Seungha gave a faint, bitter smile.

“What could these reasons be that you’re creating such an atmosphere?”

He couldn’t tell whether he intended to explain, but he could certainly feel that he was stalling.

“Whatever the reason is, what difference does it make? It’s all in the past. Whatever the reason, we can’t go back to how things were.”

“…”

“Back then, I followed you because of my youthful feelings. You were really cool then. You were unlike anyone I’d known before.”

Seungha briefly furrowed his brow at his words, then bit his lip hard as if trying to control his expression. “So I look like shit now?”

“That’s not what I meant.” Yeowon laughed incredulously at his sarcastic response. “I still think you’re amazing.”

“…”

“Supporting two siblings, earning your own money, living well.”

“You think I’m living well?”

“At least better than someone like me with no future, no dreams, who hasn’t earned even 10,000 won by myself.”

“You’re still a college student. Besides, your parents are wealthy, so what’s the problem?”

“I don’t really want to attend college. I might as well drop out. If it weren’t for Lee Taegang, I probably wouldn’t even go.”

“… So Lee Taegang still controls you, I see.”

“See? Pathetic, right?”

“No. It’s infuriating.”

Yeowon narrowed his eyes at this unexpected answer, wondering what he meant.

“I’m furious at Lee Taegang for still having you wrapped around his finger.”