TIN 128

My eye color completely changed not long after leaving Theo’s house. My eyes, which had an imperceptible blue tinge, turned as blue as her in just three days. As clear and blue as the sea on a cloudless day.

In my naive childhood, I would have been overjoyed. I would have asked if I now had a scent too, since I finally had the same color as her. I might have looked in the mirror several times a day, enjoying the sea contained in both his eyes and mine.

But now it was different. Knowing what the changed eye color meant, I could no longer feel pure joy. It was just one more thing to hide, one more weakness I couldn’t conceal.

How suspicious would it be? As Joo Do-hwa had said, if a bottom-feeding male prostitute had an extremely rare trait, it would be extremely suspicious. And moreover, if it was dominant enough to change eye color, it would be even more so.

‘Don’t tell anyone.’

Though I didn’t fully understand those words, I vaguely realized something. That my trait would never help me. That at minimum, people would question who my parents were.

Fortunately or unfortunately, my pheromones barely emerged. Besides the day I first differentiated, I rarely felt much discomfort. When alone in my quarters, I even tried deliberately releasing them, but no matter how hard I tried, they remained a faint vibration.

Maybe something was wrong with me? That brief worry soon disappeared. I had no time to leisurely worry about such things, and even if something was really wrong, there was no way to fix it. After all, I couldn’t even go to a hospital, since there currently was a manhunt for me.

Yeah, so I just had to endure.

“…”

The sound of waves was similar to rain. Occasional bird cries, and the rustling of sand. A landscape where that was all you could hear felt strangely unreal.

As soon as I reached the sea, I walked along the beach with my feet in the water. Each time I plunged my feet into the shallow water, soft sand tickled between my toes. Since the seawater wasn’t very cold yet, I didn’t feel chilled despite being in it for quite a while.

I considered tearing my wet skirt several times out of discomfort. Since I couldn’t walk around in rags, I decided to hold my hemline more carefully while enjoying the sea. Though I wanted to jump right in, my last bit of reason restrained such impulses.

Later, I left the water and plopped down on the beach. Despite trying not to get wet earlier, I didn’t mind getting covered in sand. I also believed it would look fine after drying and shaking it off.

So now, I sat hugging my knees on the beach, blankly staring at the sea. Since it was high tide, the water was closer than before. Soon it would barely reach my toes, but since I was already wet, it didn’t matter much.

It was a leisurely, peaceful moment. A moment I’d always dreamed of, one as joyful as my long-held wish. The blue horizon meeting the blue sky. The almost surreal, vivid colors were nearly identical to those in my memory.

“…Indeed.”

The real thing was even prettier in real-life.

How much more beautiful would it be when the sun sets here? It would surely be an overwhelming sight like that painting in Joo Do-hwa’s house. The sky, stained red as if paint had been dissolved in it, would gradually spread until it dyed even the sea.

It would be nice to build a house and live in a place like this.

Since there wasn’t a single person passing by, naturally no one disturbed me. The only noise was the lapping of waves, so there was no need to be on edge about anything. No need to sharpen my senses unnecessarily, no need to be anxious while guarding myself against everything.

‘I’ll build you a house by the sea.’

The memory that suddenly came to mind featured the person who made me most anxious lately. No, though it might be the same person, it was a child who could hardly be considered the same individual.

‘Since I have many houses anyway, I’ll give that house to you, hyung.’

Did he know that I was truly tempted by those words? That was exactly what I wanted. Enough to remember until now, over ten years later, what might have been just a child’s boast.

“Though he probably doesn’t even remember…”

I gently rested my chin on my arms folded over my knees. The seawater, clear enough to see through, repeatedly pushed in and pulled out along the beach.

They say the seawater, now just clear, wasn’t this clean in the past. Apart from the color fading for geographical reasons, indiscriminate land reclamation and unconscionable actions had led to tragedy. The results of using the sea like a trash can, dumping waste, and releasing contaminated water, were devastating.

Most fish species went extinct, and the number of mutants increased exponentially. People died from eating contaminated seafood, and gases emitted from the sea polluted even the air. Finally, when the disappearing sea began to block all access and close off, only then was it barely restored.

To think I almost couldn’t see this beauty. Since I didn’t live in that era, I couldn’t understand the stupidity of people back then. However, like Joo Do-hwa who didn’t particularly like the sea, perhaps they didn’t know its value because they already had it.

“…How stupid.”

The sneer was brief. Between those who had everything and lost it, and me who never had anything from the start, it was obvious which was better without comparing.

Well, anyway, I made it to the sea, so that was enough for now. Touching, feeling, and looking at the sea made everything else unimportant. A complete rest without anyone to disturb me, and peace I hadn’t had in a very long time soon after followed.

However, the problem was…

‘Can’t find Yoon Ji-soo.’

“…”

Where on earth are you?

Overwhelmed by sudden hopelessness, I buried my face in my arms as everything went dark. My quickened breathing calmed somewhat as I focused on listening to the waves. In my mind, his casually spoken words came to the surface again.

‘It would be fortunate if she didn’t die on that island.’

The island…it would be nice if I could go there. The problem was that I didn’t know where it was.

When I left the island where I was born and raised, I crossed the sea naked in a small box. How I didn’t drown, how I ended up on the beach—being trapped inside, I couldn’t know any of that.

It would be good if I could at least remember the direction, but sadly even that was impossible. How could a mere nine-year-old child precisely remember sea routes that didn’t even appear on maps?

Finally, as the sun was setting, I decided to get up and just walk around. I thought nothing would be solved by just sitting here. Besides, there would still be sea ahead no matter how far I walked.

I held my hat and sunglasses in one hand and my long-removed shoes in the other. Each step left clear footprints in the sand.

I wasn’t wearing contacts. Firstly, my eyes hurt too much, and secondly, they were no longer in a state to be worn again. I planned to wear sunglasses if necessary, but truthfully, I had some confidence in the matter.

When I lived on the island with her, no news from the city reached our isolated island. I only learned the name “Sea of Death” after coming inland, which showed how severe the information isolation was. Since flyers hadn’t been distributed here yet, Joo Do-hwa probably wouldn’t think I’d come to the sea.

Fortunately, as I walked along the beach, the scenery became increasingly remote. Since I had nowhere to sleep anyway, I could probably spend the night somewhere nearby. Tomorrow I’d have to find new solutions, but hadn’t I always lived by dealing with situations as they came along?

After passing an unidentifiable sign and walking much further, the sky had completely darkened. The beachfront, without a single light, darkened as quickly as the alleyways where I used to live. Once the sun crossed the horizon, everything would turn pitch black in the blink of an eye.

But in my memory, this place was different from those dirty alleys. Unlike there, where only moonlight barely shone, when I looked up at the sky here, there was something else.

“…The stars are out.”

Countless stars densely embroidered the sky as if about to pour down. Though hard to see at first, they became clearer after blinking a few times. Starting from the brightest star, scattered points spread out, each creating its own patterns.

‘Hyung, do you know what a constellation that is?’

“…”

Ah, why do I keep thinking about that child?

Was it because this place felt familiar? I kept getting needlessly nostalgic. Though I always remembered memories with the child, now even clearer, mundane moments filled my mind.

‘They say people used to find their way using constellations.’

If I’d known this would happen, I should have asked about that method. Since we counted countless stars together, it might have been a way to find the path back to the island.

“…What?”

What broke my reverie was a woman’s voice from somewhere. Though it should have been startling, I furrowed my brow and turned toward it. Ridiculously, at that moment, I felt like she had interrupted me.

“Hey, this is private property.”

The woman who spoke warningly approached from far ahead in the direction I was heading in. As the distance closed quickly, I could see at a glance she was quite tall for a woman.

While I could neither answer nor run away, she frowned sharply from exactly five steps away.

“If you enter without permission…”

But the threatening woman suddenly stopped speaking as if frozen in place. Her dazed eyes focused exactly on my face.

Could she see my eye color in this darkness? As I belatedly tried to cover my face, a stunned voice flowed from her lips.

“…Ji-soo Unnie?”