LM 19

Kwon Yuwon wasn’t mistaken at all when he said what he said. Alphas were born promiscuous, with no regard for chastity. The man before him was a prime example of all this. But thinking about it calmly, they were consenting adults, not children. What right did Kwon Siyul have to judge?

What business was it of his who Woo Hyunse spent his rut with or took as a partner?

“…Never mind then.”

Deflated, Kwon Siyul mumbled, shrinking his previously stiff neck back. At this point, he didn’t even know why he was even sitting in the same space as Woo Hyunse. Thinking he was just wasting his time, Kwon Siyul was about to quietly get up. Woo Hyunse’s hand reached across the table and grabbed Kwon Siyul’s wrist, stopping him.

His fingers crept inside the cuff of Kwon Siyul’s sleeve. He pressed against the wrist bone with his fingertips, then slowly stroked downward.

“I’ll take you home.”

The touch burned like fire flickering across his skin. He knew he should pull his hand away, but his arm wouldn’t budge an inch.

“I didn’t drink today. What I had earlier was non-alcoholic.”

Woo Hyunse preemptively cut off any mention of designated drivers. Kwon Siyul closed his mouth, which had opened just like a bird’s beak. Why was he hesitating when he could just turn this man down? He turned his head sharply, trying to mask his complicated feelings as something else.

“Then just take me home today…For the last time.”

It was just because it was too cold to walk, and for no other reason that he accepted. Or that was what he told himself. Kwon Siyul clenched his fist and twisted his wrist to pull it free.

Woo Hyunse’s firm fingertips brushed over Kwon Siyul’s curled fingers. A beat slower, as if reluctant to release him.

***

Kwon Siyul lay sprawled out, holding his hand up to eye level and staring blankly at it. Wearing a short-sleeved shirt in the warm room, his wrist bones were clearly visible. It was an ordinary wrist with no particular features about it. The prominent wrist bones, knuckles, and calloused fingers weren’t beautiful by any measure. Only the white, unblemished skin was somewhat presentable.

He clenched his fist in the air, arm stretched toward the fluorescent light. Woo Hyunse had grabbed this wrist earlier. His hand was large and generous, like a pot lid. His touch had been hot as if long-warmed by a fire, and his grip was strong. He didn’t twist or squeeze. He just held on, pushing his fingers into the sleeve to touch his wrist bone.

Though it was a simple act of restraint, the heat still felt like it was engraved on his wrist. Feeling flushed, Kwon Siyul turned to his side, pulling his arm close to his body.

As if an invisible handprint had been left behind, he fiddled with his wrist with his other hand, then pressed his nose to it. It still felt as if Woo Hyunse’s scent still lingered on his skin. His eyelashes fluttered and settled as all these complicated feelings washed over him.

“…Hic!”

Startled by his own actions, he quickly pulled his hand away and shook it in the air. After thoroughly shaking his wrist, he cursed, “Ah, crazy,” “Ah, shit,” and buried his face in the pillow. Though there were no witnesses around to see him like this, he still couldn’t help feeling ashamed and kicked at the fluffy blanket with his long legs.

The sound of the door bursting open interrupted Kwon Siyul’s antics. He jerked his head up. Kwon Yuwon looked him up and down, stiff as a board. His gaze was sharp like a detective examining a prime suspect. Or perhaps it just seemed that way because of his upturned, cat-like eyes that seemed like they didn’t miss a thing.

“Why are you so startled? Were you jerking off?”

“Are you crazy…Why would you think I was jerking off?”

“You’re looking around with wide eyes like a mouse caught stealing. Like this.”

Kwon Yuwon grinned, using his index finger and thumb to pull his eyes wide open. Mocked, Kwon Siyul threw the pillow he was hugging at him. Kwon Yuwon caught it in midair. He hugged it tightly, then suddenly buried his nose in it. He sniffed it as if he were a hunting dog honing onto someone’s scent.

“What’s wrong?”

“What’s this?”

He tilted his head, sniffed again, and looked at Kwon Siyul with a pair of unsettled eyes. He quickly approached and grabbed Kwon Siyul, who was trying to pull away, and buried his nose in Kwon Siyul’s cheek and ear, inhaling deeply. Even as Kwon Siyul tried pushing him away, asking what he was doing, Kwon Yuwon held firm.

“What’s wrong with this crazy guy today? Did you eat something weird?”

Kwon Yuwon shut his mouth, pulled at Kwon Siyul’s clothes to check the smell, then jerked his head up. Suddenly, a cold light gleamed in his eyes.

“Did you meet an alpha?”

“What are you talking about?”

Kwon Siyul pulled his clothes up to his nose. He only smelled the savory scent of fried food from the bar and a faint fabric softener smell. Even if some pheromones had rubbed off on him, how would he, a beta, know about it? Kwon Siyul tried to hide his unease and pretend to be innocent.

“I smell alpha on you. Who left their pheromones on you?”

“Can omegas distinguish alpha and omega scents?”

“Don’t change the subject. What the hell? Why do you smell like this?”

Like a husband catching evidence of an affair, Kwon Yuwon pressed Kwon Siyul for an answer. He grabbed his collar and shook him back and forth. Dizzy, Kwon Siyul groaned and tried to stop him, grabbing hold of his wrists with both hands.

“No, maybe a customer at the bar was an alpha! I’m a beta, how would I know if an alpha left their scent on me or if it just rubbed off in passing? Ah, stop shaking me. I’m about to throw up.”

Mixing in half-truths with his whining, Kwon Siyul managed to get Kwon Yuwon to let go, though he still looked suspicious.

“It wouldn’t linger like this from just brushing past. It means you were in a confined space together or they grabbed you…Does that bar you work at allow touching?”

Kwon Yuwon was as sharp as ever. Kwon Siyul had a feeling he’d make a good detective someday. Making a mental note to suggest he try out for the police exam, Kwon Siyul raised the volume of his voice defensively.

“Ah, it’s nothing like that. We just brushed past when taking an order. And even if I smell like alpha, what does it matter to me? I can’t even smell it.”

“That’s true, but…”

“Stop saying weird things and go shower first, okay? You reek of food and it’s making me hungry. Come out quick so we can get a late-night snack. I’ll go to the convenience store and bring something back.”

Kwon Yuwon still looked dubious to the very end. Kwon Siyul pushed his back as he inhaled sharply, shoving him into the bathroom before leaving the inn.

At the convenience store, he immediately went over to the personal care aisle and bought a pheromone deodorant first thing. He didn’t spray it on right away. It would only raise more suspicion if he suddenly got rid of the scent. He filled his basket with other snacks and put them on the counter. While the clerk was ringing him up, he pulled his sleeve to his nose and took a sniff.

“…”

No matter how much he sniffed, he couldn’t smell anything beyond the scent from the bar. Kwon Siyul exhaled sharply and rubbed his nose. Somehow, his mood had dampened.

Kwon Siyul returned with an armful of late-night snacks: cup noodles, sausages, chips, ice cream, instant fried rice, and dumplings. The two of them were hungry youths. Though past their teens when all they wanted to eat was iron, their appetites were still enormous. Kwon Yuwon especially acted like he was starving all the time.

Kwon Siyul finished his portion and watched contentedly. This indulgence was possible thanks to Woo Hyunse generously allowing him to use his first paycheck.

Freshly showered and now satiated from the food, Kwon Yuwon was much calmer. He lay on his side like a Buddha statue, flipping through TV channels and scratching his protruding belly lazily. Though pretty in appearance, his actions seemed no different from those of a manual laborer at a construction site.

“You’ll turn into a cow if you lie down right after eating. Sit up.”

“Being a cow would be nice. Just grazing on grass all day without having to work.”

“What if you get dragged to the slaughterhouse?”

Despite Kwon Siyul’s efforts to make him sit up, Kwon Yuwon just giggled without taking his eyes off the TV. Kwon Siyul glanced at him cautiously while popping the remaining snacks into his mouth. As he chewed, he casually brought up the topic.

“About that pheromone smell…Can all alphas and omegas smell it?”

“Yeah.”

“Are all the smells different? Then what do you smell like?”

Kwon Yuwon glanced over and opened his mouth like a baby swallow. Kwon Siyul tossed him a chip, which he promptly caught in his mouth and started chewing.

“They say I smell like oranges.”

“Are there any bad smells?”

“Sometimes among alpha bastards. But most are okay. Tolerable.”

Kwon Siyul kept offering chips while carefully gauging Kwon Yuwon’s reaction. Fortunately, Kwon Yuwon didn’t seem to notice anything strange about where their current conversation was going.

“Yuwon, what was that smell on me earlier like?”

Kwon Yuwon’s chewing paused momentarily. He looked at Kwon Siyul with sharp, upturned eyes.

“Why are you curious about that?”

“Well, I can’t smell it myself. If it’s unpleasant, it might bother other customers. I want to avoid that customer if they come in. What if it’s like a fishy smell?”

Kwon Siyul lied nonchalantly. Kwon Yuwon quickly dropped his suspicions at Kwon Siyul’s apparent lack of serious interest.

“…No. Objectively, it’s a good scent. It’s hard to describe…Ah, it’s exactly like this kind of atmosphere.”

After thinking about it some more, Kwon Yuwon snapped his fingers and pointed at the TV. It was a travel program. A forest blanketed in white snow, bare white birch trees pointing their sharp branches toward the dark grey sky.

“A scent like that?”

“Yeah. Quiet and cold? Kind of like trees. It’s quite strong. Unpleasantly so.”

Kwon Yuwon furrowed his brow, seemingly irritated just recalling it. Sensing he might lose his temper if pressed any further, Kwon Siyul closed his mouth.

A scent like a birch forest—it was even harder to imagine now. Kwon Siyul compared the scent he sensed while once caught in those arms—a lonely, chilly winter sea—to this unknown pheromone scent, figuring the two must be similar. Any curiosity about whether there might be a commercial perfume with a similar scent was brushed away to the back of his mind along with the chip crumbs.