LM 76

He couldn’t leave Woo Hyunse now. It wasn’t a matter of his feelings. Woo Hyunse wouldn’t let him go, and more importantly, if he left, Kwon Yuwon’s life would be in danger. He could be banished to an island, but if Woo Hyunse withdrew the bodyguards he had assigned to Kwon Yuwon, a truly difficult situation could arise.

Perhaps unknowingly, something inside of him was desperately seeking excuses to stay with Woo Hyunse even a minute longer. Or it could be close to self-rationalization.

Whatever the reason, Kwon Siyul made a decision. To stay by Woo Hyunse’s side. Thinking that as more time passed and Woo Hyunse was about to get married, or after his marriage, if his feelings changed, it wouldn’t be too late to leave then.

Or if not, before that time came around, he might go first.

Snow was falling heavily outside the dark window. Snowflakes drew diagonal lines following the biting wind. Kwon Siyul leaned against the window frame and gazed down absently. Cars lined up on the road with red and yellow lights on like Christmas tree bulbs. The flow of traffic was sluggish due to the snowfall.

Kwon Siyul stared blankly at his reflection in the glass window. His hair had grown quite long. He fiddled with the hair covering his nape and brushed back his bangs that had come down to nearly poke his eyes. He decided that when he left this place, he should get his hair cut first.

Unconsciously, he spread his hand and noticed his neatly trimmed, round nails. This too was done by Woo Hyunse. He had restrained Kwon Siyul, who was screaming that he hated it and not to touch him, and trimmed each nail one by one with nail clippers.

At first his fingers had looked thick and rough like bear paws, incapable of such delicate work, but the other man had somehow managed to trim them well into crescent shapes without any rough edges.

Woo Hyunse was this gentle.

And equally cruel.

Kwon Siyul chuckled to himself and soon made a crying face. Lately, his emotions were like a wildly fluctuating graph. Though he thought he shouldn’t be like this, when he saw or thought of Woo Hyunse, depression and wry laughter followed each other endlessly as if he were going mad.

“…Pull yourself together.”

He roughly rubbed his face, dragging himself back to reality from wandering too far into his memories. Woo Hyunse was outside the door. Seeing it snow, he hadn’t left the house. Though he could work in the study, he spread out his laptop and documents in the living room, like a guard dog at the door. Disgusted by such a sight, Kwon Siyul had closed the door completely.

He had tried hard enough by now. If it was a wall that wouldn’t crumble, compromise could be one of the good options. Kwon Siyul decided to resign himself to his fate for the time being.

Though it was the door to his own room, he couldn’t open it himself. He was left with no other choice but to knock three times. Compared to before when he had pounded it as if to break his fist, his spirit had dampened considerably.

Hearing footsteps approaching, he stepped back. The door opened. Kwon Siyul looked only at the floor, twisting the hem of his clothes in his hand. His palm was sticky.

“I won’t go out. As you said…I’ll stay home.”

He got straight to the point. Woo Hyunse crossed his arms and leaned obliquely against the doorframe.

“How can I believe that?”

Just from his posture, it was clear he had less than a rat’s tail of trust in him. But he hadn’t done anything wrong. Kwon Siyul raised his head abruptly, feeling indignant.

“Why can’t you believe me?”

“Because Mr. Kwon Siyul is good at lying.”

He wanted to argue when he had done that, but starting with Woo Taeju, there were quite a few things that pricked his conscience. He was about to deny it, saying he had never done such a thing, but after meeting Woo Hyunse’s gaze, he quietly turned his head away.

“…You said Yuwon would be in danger if I left.”

“…”

“You won’t let me leave anyway, and Yuwon is involved, so that’s why.”

Woo Hyunse simply looked down at the top of Kwon Siyul’s head. Even without seeing it, Kwon Siyul knew his gaze was full of doubt and mistrust.

“I feel suffocated. Please let me at least get some fresh air.”

Though he didn’t seem particularly willing, Woo Hyunse turned his body sideways, making enough space for Kwon Siyul to squeeze through. Kwon Siyul walked out to the living room without looking at Woo Hyunse. Even this was a rare outing for him. It was his first step outside after being confined to his room, half voluntarily and half forcibly.

“I mean it. Even if I go out, I’ll come back here. …I don’t really have anywhere else to go anyway.”

Kwon Siyul added, hoping to regain at least some trust. Woo Hyunse came close and embraced Kwon Siyul from behind. He buried his cheek on the crown of Kwon Siyul’s head and wrapped his arms around his waist. Kwon Siyul raised his hands as if to remove the arms entwined like chains, but then curled his fingers in the air and lowered them.

“Don’t go anywhere even after the Kwon Yuwon matter is over.”

“…”

“This is our home.”

Our. It was time for a wry smile amongst all that depression and bitter laughter. But depression struck a step faster, and Kwon Siyul could neither cry nor laugh. Even though the body heat he had longed for was comforting, Kwon Siyul couldn’t feel the warmth. Unlike his skin that was warming up, underneath it felt cold as if covered in frost.

* * *

No matter how many times he called, there was no answer. Woo Taeju sent what must have been his umpteenth text message before letting his arm holding the phone drop limply.

With no contact from Kwon Siyul, he couldn’t focus on anything. Even though his mother clicked her tongue, telling him to at least go out, he had no motivation to do anything. He had always been busy drinking and having fun, but now he had lost interest in all of those things.

He had also tried contacting Woo Hyunse, but of course, there was no reply. Calls were rejected, and texts were obviously not read. Compared to the past when he would respond at least twice out of ten times no matter how busy he was, this was now a complete and thorough ignore.

It couldn’t be that Woo Hyunse, of all people, would treat him like this. Due to the anger from having his messages ruthlessly ignored, and the sense of betrayal from realizing Woo Hyunse and Kwon Siyul were already in that kind of relationship, Woo Taeju had been losing sleep recently. He would jolt awake even while sleeping and greet the morning with rising indignation.

He had tried not to resort to this if possible. He didn’t like how he was just lying around waiting for a response, which didn’t suit his temperament. Woo Taeju finally got up and prepared to go out. His mother, who was drinking tea in the living room, brightened up asking if he was finally going out, but he didn’t bother to act cute asking for pocket money as usual.

He immediately grabbed his car keys and headed to the building where Woo Hyunse’s office was located. It was an office in a building under Woo Hyunse’s name, standing prominently on prime real estate.

Taking a deep breath in front of the door, he got on the elevator with the gravity of a general invading enemy territory. He wasn’t sure if Woo Hyunse would even be in the office. If it were the past, he would have at least asked Park Hae-jeong, his confidant, but for some reason, his whereabouts were also unknown.

He made it to the office safely. The secretary, though clearly recognizing his face, threw out a single indifferent word to wait in an extremely businesslike manner. Sitting on an expensive sofa waiting, Woo Taeju didn’t hide his anxiety and dissatisfaction, constantly tapping the floor with his foot.

The secretary, who had been busy working between laptop and phone, finally called Woo Taeju to the front desk. Hiding his sweaty palms in fists, Woo Taeju entered the office. Woo Hyunse, sitting at his desk and uncharacteristically wearing glasses, didn’t even raise his head despite someone entering.

“Hyung.”

After the secretary left, he called Woo Hyunse softly. But Woo Hyunse didn’t take his eyes off the monitor. His expression was even nonchalant as if he didn’t even recognize Woo Taeju’s presence. He didn’t seem surprised by the sudden visit without notice. Either he had anticipated it, or it wasn’t even worth being surprised about.

“What?”

At least he’s asking. Woo Taeju was about to sit on the nearby sofa but changed his mind, crossed his arms, and stood in front of the desk. He was going to wait until Woo Hyunse’s eyes looked this way. In response to this unprecedented silent protest, Woo Hyunse let out a long, silent sigh and took off his glasses.

“What did you do with Siyul hyung’s phone?”

Even though he was clearly looking down at him, when their eyes met with Woo Hyunse looking up, a chill ran down his spine. Trying to hide his agitation, he deliberately set his jaw firmly and didn’t avoid eye contact.

“That’s none of your business.”

“Why not? Hyung, are you possibly holding Siyul hyung captive?”

“Since when is Kwon Siyul your ‘hyung’? Did you have a half-sibling I didn’t know about?”

“That’s not what I meant!”

Even when he shouted, slamming the desk with a bang, Woo Hyunse didn’t even flinch. He just leaned back deeply in his chair, resting his elbows on the armrests. He carelessly held his glasses, one of the temples nearly touching his lips.

“You really took Siyul hyung, didn’t you? You were the last one to take him that day.”

“And what if you know that?”

“Of course…! Hyung, is it really true?”

He had said it as a wild guess, thinking ‘surely he wouldn’t do that,’ but Woo Hyunse gave no clear yes or no answer. He just smiled ambiguously. Woo Taeju had never seen Woo Hyunse’s smile look so wicked before.

“Hyung, this isn’t right. Let Siyul hyung go. Give his phone back too. This is a crime. I don’t want to report my own flesh and blood.”

Reading the answer from that smile, Woo Taeju expressed his opinion calmly, with shock. Even as the persuasion dragged on, Woo Hyunse simply listened leisurely as if he had all the time in the world.

“It’s better for you and for Siyul hyung. And you’re getting married. In our world, having a lover while married might not be anything special, but Siyul hyung isn’t that kind of person. He’s an ordinary person. A beta. You’re an alpha. Do you think people with different traits can get along well? Siyul hyung doesn’t suit you.”

Woo Hyunse’s smile twisted subtly, but Woo Taeju didn’t notice. Believing he was being persuaded, he just kept talking earnestly. After pretending to listen attentively to the one-sided speech, Woo Hyunse stood up, pushing his chair back. He put on his coat from the hanger and picked up his phone from the desk.

“I have a prior engagement. How long are you going to keep talking?”

“Did you hear what I said? I’m telling you to let Siyul hyung go.”

“Mind your own business. This isn’t something for you to interfere with.”