TIN 51

Water from the showerhead soaked my entire body. The stream of water flowed down my neck with a hissing sound. Although the temperature was warm enough to create steam, the chill in my stomach showed no signs of disappearing.

“…”

I brushed back my wet hair and looked down at the container in my hand. The interior of the long cylinder, which fit perfectly in one hand, was filled with a transparent, thin liquid. Knowing what this object was used for, I couldn’t help but let out a sigh that rose to my throat.

“…What am I doing?”

It was what people commonly call massage gel. The object that Henry had handed to me with a sour face. And the item that Joo Do-hwa said was absolutely necessary for ‘preparation.’

‘Young master, what is this…’

When Joo Do-hwa said it earlier, Henry couldn’t accept his words right away. He showed a confused look as if he had misheard something. However, despite Henry’s hesitation, Joo Do-hwa spoke without changing his expression.

‘Do you want me to say it twice?’

‘…’

A single word from his master was enough to make Henry close his mouth. Henry looked at Joo Do-hwa for a moment, then lowered his gaze, reflexively gripping my shoulder tightly.

‘…I’ll get him ready.’

And so, the place Henry took me was one of the empty rooms. It seemed to be a guest room, with only a bed inside and a small nightstand as the only furniture. There was also a bathroom inside, but again, there were no signs of prior use.

Naturally, Henry couldn’t tell me to undress right away. He just left me alone in the room, went somewhere, and then looked at me with complicated eyes. His pale green eyes were filled with a troubled expression.

‘I’ll do it.’

That was about all the reaction I could muster. I held out my hand to Henry and spoke with as nonchalant a face as possible.

‘If you give me the gel, I’ll take care of it myself.’

I said the same thing when Henry offered to treat my wounds before.

I was nervous that he might offer to do it again, but fortunately, Henry handed me the gel without saying anything. He probably didn’t want to put his fingers in someone else’s back hole either. Even so, he gave me a somewhat distrustful look, but seemed to understand after hearing my follow-up words.

‘I know how to do it.’

Both Joo Do-hwa and Henry, who assisted him, would know that I came from Oceans. So he nodded with a face that said he understood. I was in charge of serving at Oceans, but there was no need to mention that far.

After convincing Henry like that, I came into the bathroom alone and stayed blank for a while. It was because I wondered if I could still run away even now.

“…”

How did it even come to this?

As I washed my body with hot water, I went over the conversation with Joo Do-hwa several times in my head. I didn’t know what he was angry about, but I thought it was too late to turn back now. The only situation worth looking forward to wass him leaving after insulting me for not being able to get it up when we actually tried it out.

“…I don’t think I’ll even be able to get it up.”

He said why bother sleeping with a beta who didn’t even get wet.

I didn’t know what Joo Do-hwa’s preferences were, but I knew that there was no desire in his gaze when he looked at me. He said he managed to get it up somehow when I used my mouth, but things might be different when it came time for the actual act. No, if that happened, maybe he would make me do the same thing as last time, telling me to try my best to get it up.

A terrible sense of doubt and irritation washed over me right then. I thought it was something I couldn’t avoid eventually, but I didn’t like the fact that the other person was Joo Do-hwa. Should I say it felt uncomfortable? I might understand if it were Theo or Kei, but I just couldn’t imagine doing ‘that’ kind of act with the person I knew as that young child.

Of course, there were also concerns because he was an Alpha.

“Hah…”

I turned off the water coming from the showerhead with a long sigh. Even though it was foggy with steam, as soon as the water stopped, goosebumps rose all over my body. It wasn’t because the air was cold, but because of the tension I still couldn’t shake off.

I should have left earlier. I decided not to dwell too deeply on the regret that came to the surface again. I couldn’t run away right now anyway. I had no other choice but to do as I was told for now. Even if I tried to buy some time here, the end result would probably be similar.

I opened the lid of the plastic container and squeezed a generous amount onto my palm. Unlike its sticky appearance, the transparent liquid had a slippery texture like oil. It looked a bit like body wash at a glance, but it didn’t dissolve at all when it touched water.

I had no experience putting anything in, but I knew the general preparation process. I had heard it directly from the boss, and there were also stories from the Oceans’ staff. Most of it was close to sexual harassment, but I guess it didn’t matter now that the day to use it had come.

“…He said three was enough.”

I spread the gel evenly and brought my right hand behind my back. As I slid my finger along the crack of my buttocks, I instinctively frowned at the alien sensation. Finally, the tip of my middle finger touched the tightly closed entrance at its destination.

“…”

Pushing in one finger wasn’t as bad as I thought. Aside from hesitating for fear of scratching with my nail, finding the way itself wasn’t difficult. It was probably thanks to the gel I had applied in advance, but the problem was that even with just one finger inserted, an uncomfortable feeling rushed over me.

“Ugh…”

If it was like this even when I did it myself, to think he was going to order Henry to do this. Once again, curses welled up at that insulting command. Even for someone like me, I wanted to avoid a situation where I had to spread my legs like that. Well, even if I’d end up in a similar situation eventually.

I slowly pulled out the finger I had pushed in all the way. I’d heard that after doing it a few times, you get a feeling of loosening up, but having only heard about it, I didn’t know to what extent that was. Even after moving it a couple more times, my insides simply twitched, with no feeling of softening, which made it worse.

So I just forcibly pushed in another finger. The stretched hole ached dully, but that was much easier to bear. The inner walls, wet with gel, weren’t stiff, and instead, only squelching sounds echoed throughout the bathroom.

“…Hah.”

Every time I pushed my fingers in deep, my lower abdomen tensed up. I heard some guys touch their backs when masturbating. I couldn’t understand at all what was supposed to be good about this. Even when I changed direction and tried inserting from a different angle, it only felt more uncomfortable rather than good.

The one fortunate thing was that the pain down below was gradually getting better. Instead of the heavy sensation like my bottom was falling out, it felt like the stiffened muscles were slowly relaxing. When I rotated my fingers by moving my wrist, I even thought it was more manageable than when I was tense.

“Ugh…”

However, after inserting the third finger, the situation changed a bit. My arm bent backward was uncomfortable, my tense lower abdomen was cramping, and at some point, I even felt an inexplicable sensation of climax. My limp genitals showed no signs of getting erect, but a clear droplet fell from the tip.

“…Ah.”

It must have been the fluid that had been building up. I furrowed my brow, closed my eyes tightly, then opened them again. The inside of my stomach kept feeling ticklish and clenching, and at the same time, it felt like an inexplicable anxiety was washing over me.

To be honest, I wasn’t completely without fear of this unfamiliar act. I wasn’t sure if this was right, and I wasn’t confident that this was enough. I had declared that I knew how to do it, but honestly, I was a bit confused about whether three fingers were enough.

After all, hadn’t I already seen Joo Do-hwa’s thing once? I felt like I was going to suffocate when I put it in my mouth, and I didn’t think it would be any different putting it in down there. I was also worried about what would happen if my lower parts got damaged like the items they discarded at Oceans.

“…”

Before my thoughts could deepen, I quickly pulled out the fingers I had inserted. I could feel my empty insides trembling. As I rubbed around with my wet fingers, I felt the wrinkles that had loosened considerably compared to before.

This should be enough. No, even if it wasn’t enough, I didn’t have the confidence to loosen up anymore on my own. I might as well just grit my teeth and endure it. No matter what, it was just a human cock. Surely nothing would go terribly wrong from just one time.

When I came out of the room fully dressed, Henry was standing in a similar posture as before. Watching his wristwatch with an anxious face, Henry secretly let out a sigh of relief as soon as I came out. I guess he must have been quite uneasy about leaving me alone in there.

“The preparation…”

He started to speak but closed his mouth without finishing the sentence. Unable to ask all the way through, his face was full of discomfort.

Yeah, I guess this situation is awkward for you too. Maybe I should be grateful that he wasn’t asking in detail.

“…I’ll bring the young master.”